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Saturday, December 29, 2007

A Worthy Global Charity

Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

I saw this advertised on television, and just now visited the web site to see for myself.

You have the opportunity to help improve our world by purchasing and donating a laptop computer at the ONE LAPTOP PER CHILD web site.

The stated goal is to ultimately supply one laptop computer to each child in every country.

Each laptop, equipped with the Linux operating system, is designed specifically for use in Third World underdeveloped nations with limited resources.

The rugged computers, designed for children, use solar power, and include an integrated web camera, with microphone, speakers, and built-in game controllers.

Nifty, huh?

The cost of donating is four hundred dollars ($400.00) per laptop.

I'm not sure I can afford that, at least, not right now.

I think that's about half of what I paid for my own notebook computer.

They do offer a special deal where you can donate a computer and also receive a computer for your own child (or, as in my case, a favorite nephew?).

Another benefit being offered to those who donate is (I think) free Internet service from T-Mobile.

Anyway, I just wanted to alert you to this, so you can decide if it's something you might like to be involved in.

It seems like an awfully good idea to me.

If you so desire, you may share this message with others.

Thank you.

John Robert "SAIGON" Mallernee, KB3KWS
Official Bard of Clan Henderson
Armed Forces Retirement Home
Washington, D.C. 20011-8400

NOTE: "My unpopular and controversial personal opinions are independent of my Scottish clan."

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

New Pictures of ME

Howard Hickman and me.

Howard Hickman holding POW/MIA flag.

Prior to parade

Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

Here are three (03) new photographs, I just now recieved from my friend, Howard Hickman, the creator and administrator of the Phu Lam Signal Battalion web site.

These pictures were taken the morning of Saturday 10 November 2007 at the Twenty-Fifth Anniversary of the Viet Nam Memorial in Washington, D.C., prior to our parade down Constitution Avenue.

I'm the guy wearing the kilt.

Howard Hickman is holding the POW/MIA flag.

Unfortunately, one of the pictures is a little out of focus, but the other two appear okay.

If you click on these pictures, then they'll get REALLY big, and you can see a lot more detail.

Thank you.

John Robert "SAIGON" Mallernee, KB3KWS
Official Bard of Clan Henderson
Armed Forces Retirement Home
Washington, D.C. 20011-8400

NOTE: "My unpopular and controversial personal opinions are independent of my Scottish clan."

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Two News Items For Families With Young'uns

Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

I have two (02) important items of wonderful news to share with everybody.

First of all, my sister, Suzy, a retired schoolmarm living in Windsor, Virginia, has now published her SECOND novel!!!

The name of her latest book is IN CHARM'S WAY: A SAMANTHA LAURENCE ADVENTURE, and it is the sequel to her first novel, THROUGH THE SMALL DOOR.

She is already hard at work writing a third novel, continuing the adventures of Samantha Laurence.

Second, I want to remind everyone that they can use their computers to watch the North American Aerospace Defense Command (i.e., "NORAD") track Santa Claus on Christmas Eve.

If you go to the NORAD Tracks Santa web site right now, they have lots of stuff for the wee ones to look at and play with.

Thank you.

M E R R Y
C H R I S T M A S ! ! !


John Robert "SAIGON" Mallernee, KB3KWS
Official Bard of Clan Henderson
Armed Forces Retirement Home
Washington, D.C. 20011-8400

NOTE: "My unpopular and controversial personal opinions are independent of my Scottish clan."

Friday, December 14, 2007

Playing Computer Game Donates FOOD!!!

Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

My youngest sister, Kate, just sent this to me.

FREE RICE is an Internet word game you can play on your computer.

For each word that is correct, the World Food Programme donates rice to feed impoverished people in Third World countries.

Playing the game helps increase and enhance your vocabulary, plus, warming the cockles of your heart.

Similar intellectual exercises have been proven to stimulate the brain, delaying the onset and/or severity of Alzheimers and senility.

It looks like a "win - win" situation to me.

Thank you.

M E R R Y
C H R I S T M A S ! ! !


John Robert "SAIGON" Mallernee, KB3KWS
Official Bard of Clan Henderson
Armed Forces Retirement Home
Washington, D.C. 20011-8400

NOTE: "My unpopular and controversial personal opinions are independent of my Scottish clan."

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Snowball Fight Computer Game

Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

Here is a Christmas game you can play on your computer, the ELF movie Snowball Fight.

You get points by hitting elves with snowballs, but if you hit Santa Claus three times, you lose the game!

At the ELF movie web site, they also have other games and activities that will interest your little ones, such as a Coloring Book, and an Elf Training course.

MERRY CHRISTMAS, y'all!

Ho! Ho! Ho!

Thank you.

John Robert "SAIGON" Mallernee, KB3KWS
Official Bard of Clan Henderson
Armed Forces Retirement Home
Washington, D.C. 20011-8400

NOTE: "My unpopular and controversial personal opinions are independent of my Scottish clan."

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

YOUR CERTIFICATE OF AMNESTY ! ! !

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Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

 
I've got great news for you!
 
After all these years, you've finally been granted an amnesty and a pardon.
 
Go to the web site of WALTER E. WILLIAMS and click on the word, "GIFT", in the upper right hand corner of the page.
 
You can then print out a document in PDF format of a PROCLAMATION OF AMNESTY AND PARDON absolving all white people of any alleged injustices towards black people.
 
To view a larger version,
please click on the illustration.
 
Ain't it about time?
 
It's a really nice looking certificate.
 
Now, I'll have to find a frame to put it in, and a bare spot on my wall to display it.
 
Doesn't this make a wonderful Christmas present, especially considering it doesn't cost one red cent?
 
Walter E. Williams is a Professor of Economics at George Mason University, and I frequently read his editorial column at the WORLD NET DAILY web site.
 
Merry Christmas, y'all!
 
Thank you.
 
John Robert "SAIGON" Mallernee, KB3KWS
Official Bard of Clan Henderson
Washington, D.C. 20011-8400

NOTE: "My unpopular and controversial personal opinions are independent of my Scottish clan."
 
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Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Christmas Tree Lighting Ceremony

Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

I wish I had some pictures to show you from our tree lighting ceremony, but maybe there'll be one published in our next issue of the COMMUNICATOR, the official newspaper of the Armed Forces Retirement Home, as Sheila Abarr, the Home's public affairs officer, was present and snapped numerous photographs.

To begin with, I did recover from my coughing fits, and was able to perform.

There's still problems with the air coming from the ventilation duct in my room being contaminated, but with plenty of rest, lots of pills, opening my windows, and running fans, I was able to breathe and sing.

Apparently, the water in my room is also contaminated, because the indicator light on my purification filter changed from green to red.

Boy, I'm going through a lot of those water purification filters really fast!

Yes, I've repeatedly called Maintenance, but they haven't yet responded.

Furthermore, after jeopardizing my health, the administration here at the Soldiers' Home now has the gall to triple the amount of user fee I'm illegally required to pay each month, beginning in January.

Mox nix.

Anyway, on Tuesday 04 December 2007 at 1000 Hours, members of the Soldiers' Home chorus met down at the King Health Center to entertain the residents as their Christmas tree was lit.

I wore my kilt, and since this event wasn't formal, I wore moccasin boots, an Army sweater, and my Santa Claus cap, with my clan badge fastened to it.

The Catholic priest did an invocation, but it wasn't like any invocation I'd ever heard or seen.

No one bowed their heads, no one doffed their caps, and the priest just talked to the group, rather than offer an actual prayer.

What, has prayer now been banned at the Soldiers' Home?

When it was my turn, I did some solo numbers, "CHRISTMAS EVE IN WASHINGTON", "BELLS OF SAINT MARY'S", "NOLLAIG CHRIDHEIL", "STILLE NACHT", "WHAT CHILD IS THIS", "SUO GAN", "ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS YOU", and "I'LL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS".

The King Health Center used to be our hospital, but now I think it's more properly considered a hospice, or to put it even more bluntly, a charnel house.

It's rather obvious that anyone who enters is never coming out - - - alive.

I also strongly suspect rampant negligence and mistreatment of patients by the staff.

In the evening, at 1800 Hours, I went to the Douglas Hungerford Memorial Theatre in the Scott Building for the formal tree lighting ceremony of the Soldiers' Home.

Because it was a more formal setting, I wore my kilt and plaid, with miniature medals on my lapel, white shirt with black bow tie, and Santa Claus cap with clan badge attached.

Once again, the Catholic chaplain gave what was supposed to be an invocation, but obviously wasn't.

The United States Army Brass Band Quintet performed several numbers, and the chief operating officer, Tim Cox, spoke a few words, prior to the tree lights being activated.

Our little Soldiers' Home chorus sang a few carols, and then I did my solos of "CHRISTMAS EVE IN WASHINGTON", "BELLS OF SAINT MARY'S", and "NOLLAIG CHRIDHEIL".

As I sang, I did have a recurring distraction with my Santa Claus cap continually falling down over my eyes.

I reckon I need to sing without wearing a cap, because those things just get in my way.

After the program, everybody went out into the lobby for refreshments, and I was surrounded by ladies with comments and questions about Scotland and my kilt.

I was sadly surprised to learn of the recent death of Sam Brabson, one of the chorus members here in the Soldiers' Home.

One fellow asked me if I was a Mormon, and when I said I was, he said he had a book and I was in it.

The only history books I know of that mention me have photographs of me when I was a young soldier in a far away war.

Since I am now old and fat, with balding head and a full set of whiskers, I wonder how he could have recognized me?

After making it back to my room, and unlaxing for the next night or day, I enjoyed observing today's unexpected snowfall.

But, now I'm back to fighting off depression, and hiding within my room.

I sense that there is something in my character that requires I perform before an audience in order to feel right.

After a performance, when I have no more obligations, my whole system just crashes, and I stop caring about life.

I didn't used to be that way, but that's how I am now.

It's funny how I'll suddenly get excitedly interested in something, and then, without rational explanation, I'll just as quickly get bored and burn out.

The criminal mismanagement here at the Soldiers' Home sure doesn't help much.

I observed a posted notice of a memorial service for one of our recently deceased residents.

Has anyone besides myself noticed that we no longer have funerals at the Soldiers' Home, but only memorial services?

That's because the Soldiers' Home shut down the mortuary and has contracted out to local funeral homes, all of which are located in a bad area.

So, bodies of Soldiers' Home residents either turn up missing or don't get the military honors they're entitled to.

And let's be honest about race.

When I say "bad area", we all know exactly what I'm referring to, and why.

That's also why our medical treatment is so substandard.

I did notice one very unexpected improvement.

In the hallway leading to our gym, there's now an automatic defibrillator in a rack mounted on the wall.

What a great idea!

Ah, but that thing's going to get stolen, just wait and see.

Shucky darn, maybe I'll steal it and include it with my own medical trauma response kit.

Aside from that, the current management here at the Soldiers' Home seems to be deliberately reversing history.

There used to be copies of a book in our library, a history of the Soldiers' Home.

Those copies have all been stolen, along with many other historical books, documents, maps, and photographs.

But, I remember reading about the early years of the Soldiers' Home.

Old soldiers dreaded coming here, for there was nothing to do except wait around for the Grim Reaper.

Since then, the Soldiers' Home developed into a vibrant and active full service retirement community, a really wonderful place to live.

But, all of that has now changed.

In the efforts to save money, many employees have been fired, many programs and benefits have been taken away, and standard health and safety rules are ignored.

No longer is admission restricted to only those who are healthy enough to walk and care for themselves, and the multitude of walkers and wheelchairs, combined with the prevalence of senility, clog up the hallways and make chow lines in the mess hall unnavigable, as these buildings weren't originally designed for this.

Once again, the Soldiers' Home is back to being the kind of place an old soldier would be terrified to go to, for there's nothing here except waiting for the inevitable.

Here in my room, I listen to Security on my amateur radio, hearing the emergency calls for ambulances, or responses to deaths.

That's every day and every night.

If I were to go outside, I could listen to the gunshots and sirens.

Yes, my room is fully furnished and comfortable (except for the air and the water), and I reckon that's why I see no reason to go outside my door.

I wonder if there's any way to change this situation?

There doesn't seem to be any accountability, culpability, or liability where the management is concerned.

The Pentagon used to be in charge, but I don't think they are anymore.

I don't know who is.

Thank you.

John Robert "SAIGON" Mallernee, KB3KWS
Official Bard of Clan Henderson
Armed Forces Retirement Home
Washington, D.C. 20011-8400

NOTE: "My unpopular and controversial personal opinions are independent of my Scottish clan."



Sunday, December 02, 2007

2007 Scottish Christmas Walk


Clan Henderson Bodyguard

Clan Henderson Banner

Russell Henderson, editor of AN CANACH,
and I, enjoying supper at the ceilidh.

The Sing Out Jam Out Folksinging Group

Me and the Scottish Santa

Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

First of all, I have posted a video on the Internet of me singing my Scottish Christmas carol, "NOLLAIG CHRIDHEIL".

It can also be viewed at America On Line, You Tube, My Space, and the Clan Henderson web site.

Saturday 01 December 2007 was a VERY long and busy day for me, as I am rather reclusive and seldom leave my room here at the Old Soldiers' Home.

After a long night of tossing and turning (because I can't relax when I'm anticipating a pending obligation), I got up really early, so I would have plenty of time to get myself dressed and not forget anything essential to be loaded into my pickup truck.

John Smith, retired from the United States Marine Corps, and also a retired deputy sheriff from New Hampshire, went along with me.

Enroute, I had quite a bit of trouble when I missed turns directed by my Tom Tom GO 514 portable GPS, as I got confused and intimidated by the normal flow(?) of traffic in the District of Columbia megalopolis area, and as road construction caused unscheduled detours.

Ah, but without my portable GPS, I could never drive anywhere in this area.

Finally, I made it to Old Town Alexandria, Virginia, but because of the height of my full-sized four wheel drive pickup truck, I parked several blocks away, in a paid parking area next to the river, rather than chancing the free underground parking garage, which posted a height restriction of six feet.

I began by meeting with fellow clansmen at La Madeleine for breakfast, but it was far too crowded for me to be comfortable, so I eventually wandered back out into the chilly morning air.

At the Market Square, in front of the courthouse, farmers and bakers had set up their wares, and there were free samples of fruit to alleviate my thirst.
The greatest difficulty to be endured when marching in a parade is standing around waiting for the parade to begin, especially if it's cold.

But, I did enjoy spending some time in out of the cold, looking at model railroads in Whistle Stop Hobbies, which had opened unusually early just to accommodate the parade participants.

Clan Henderson gathered at the corner of Wolfe and Pitt Streets, and it was a HUMONGOUS turnout, the largest gathering of Clan Henderson I have yet witnessed.

As we waited for the parade to begin, the sunny day began warming up to a more comfortable temperature, and everybody enjoyed greeting old friends and socializing.

I had brought my sword, thinking I would be carrying it in a traditional salute during the parade, but I was instructed to loan my sword to another clansman, as he would be one of our bodyguards, and I, as bard of our clan, would march with the appointed officials.

Because of the type of frog that I have, it is impossible to actually wear my sword, due to the bulk of the hilt interfering with the side of my Argyll jacket.

So, I just carry it in my hand, and when marching, wear only the scabbard, as the unsheathed sword is held forth in salute.

At least one individual who observed me walking about with my sheathed baskethilt sword in my hand mistakenly thought I was carrying a ceremonial mace.

Finally, we got started, and it was a very nice parade through a pleasant and historic community.
As we marched along, parade participants would yell "Merry Christmas!" to the spectators, and boy, were there ever a BUNCH of spectators!

It was a massive crowd.
When we reached the end of our march, I quickly doubled back to watch the rest of the parade, as it was quite long, and had numerous entries.

I was attired in full Highland regalia, wearing both kilt and plaid, my full-sized medals arrayed on my Argyll jacket, my dirk on my side, and with my sheathed baskethilt sword in my hand.

Based on previous experience, I suspected some folks would want to take my picture, and sure enough, that's what happened.

My sister had made me some business cards, so I could request the various individuals to e-mail me a copy of the photograph.

Thus, two (02) of the photographs are included with this message.

I like puppy dogs, and there's always plenty of dogs marching in the parade.

I petted several dogs with my gloved hand, and later, when I wiped my glove across my mouth, I got an impromptu snack of dog hair, and spitting and attempting to clean my mouth turned out to be futile.

The final entry was a firetruck with Santa Claus riding on top.

A reviewing stand for various officials was set up in the intersection of Cameron and Fairfax Streets, and now that the parade was over, several pipe bands marched over to give a massed performance in front of the reviewing stand.

From where I stood, I could also see some Highland dancers, but only the tops of their heads.

John Smith showed up and told me that Greg Moore, who works at the Soldiers' Home in the Public Affairs Office was also attending the parade.

John was planning to go enjoy some pints at the pub, so we decided to separate, and he would find alternate transportation back to the Soldiers' Home.

After the spectacular departure of the pipe and drum units, I walked about on Market Square, where a local group of Continental soldiers re-enacting the American Revolutionary War were firing volleys and beating drums.

As I walked down to the river to retrieve my truck, I was questioned by a curious passerby who was unaware of the annual Scottish Christmas Walk.

Boy, was I tired and in pain!

But, my day's activities were only just starting.

Using my trusty GPS, I drove to the Crystal Plaza Apartments in Arlington to meet with a group of local folk singing aficiandos, the Sing Out Jam Out (i.e., "SoJo") from the Internet.

Even with my GPS, I still had trouble finding the place, due to the confusion generated by all the rushing traffic which surrounded me, and the difficulty in determining building numbers and street names.

But, I eventually got there, and boy, was it ever a deal of fun!

It really lifted my spirits to sit there with a bunch of musicians and singers and try to strum along with them, as we played and sang songs I knew, and songs I have yet to learn.

Everybody in the group picks a number to perform, and being unfamiliar with them, I abdicated my first opportunity, but later, I chose "TODAY".

We're meeting again on Sunday 16 December to sing Christmas songs.

Because I seldom leave my room, generally avoiding human interaction, and have been struggling with increasing depression, which resulted in me gradually losing interest in my music, thus seldom touching my guitar, this jam session was really good therapy, though it appeared rather evident that we were polar opposites politically and philosophically.

After the jam session, I once again used my invaluably essential GPS to navigate to Saint Mark's Episcopal Church in Alexandria, Virginia for the Clan Henderson ceilidh.

That was a pleasant visit, with plenty of good food and entertainment.

This time, we didn't have a group dance, but we did have a charity auction to raise funds for the children of military personnel serving in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Scots have a military heritage, and in fact, by definition, Scottish clans are traditionally organized military units, so as you might guess, just about everybody there was either still on active duty in military service, or they were decorated veterans from old campaigns.

I have seen numerous Scots who publicly deny it, but the kilt IS a male military uniform.

Our clan had a couple of birthdays, including Russell Henderson, the editor of our clan's quarterly newsletter, AN CANACH, so there was a nice birthday cake, plus ham, beef, and all the trimmings.

We had a contest where blindfolded lasses guessed by feel which of the lad's knees were the most attractive, and I and one other were selected.

When it was my turn to perform, I sang "LAND OF LIGHT", by William Jackson, and "CHRISTMAS EVE IN WASHINGTON", by Maura Sullivan.

Now, I'm safely back in my room here at the Old Soldiers' Home, where I'm - - - sick!

No, it wasn't Saturday's activities that has me ill.

It was the combination of those old cold cut sandwiches in my refrigerator, plus my hiatal hernia, plus not taking my medication, plus - - - foul CIGARETTE SMOKE coming into my room through the ventilator duct!
I keep reporting the problem, but the administration won't do anything, so I just keep getting sick at the most inconvenient times.
Personally, I think somebody ought to go to jail, and I wish I could sue them for ruining my health.

Tomorrow, I'm supposed to sing some solo numbers for our annual Christmas tree lighting ceremony here at the Soldiers' Home.

But, right now, I'm too sick to even try to sing, and I doubt I'll get well in time for my performance.

I'm very susceptible to respiratory infection, and when I get sick, I stay sick for a very long time, with each subsequent bout having a progressively worse effect on me than the one before.

Oh well, I can still enjoy my little Christmas tree and the crackling fireplace on my television.

Thank you.

Official Bard of Clan Henderson
Washington, D.C. 20011-8400

NOTE: "My unpopular and controversial personal opinions are independent of my Scottish clan."