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Friday, June 28, 2013

I WON A CONTEST ! ! !

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*************** WARNING ! ! ! *************** 

This dangerously illegal and highly immoral subversive underground resistance message is being surreptitiously monitored by the Beaming Internet Government Broadband Radio Oscillation Telecommunications Hearing Electronics Reconnaissance (i.e., "B.I.G. B.R.O.T.H.E.R.") as part of a coordinated clandestine domestic surveillance investigation, in cooperation with the National Administration of Zealous Interrogation (i.e., "N.A.Z.I.") and the Commission on Message Monitoring Investigative Electronics (i.e., "C.O.M.M.I.E.").

Serious felony criminal charges are pending, with extreme penalties yet to be determined! 

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Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

I've been thinking (something which, for me, is ALWAYS dangerous!), and wondering about how I could win the title of Mr. America, or Mr. Universe, or some other similar fancy title?

Well, I don't reckon I've got much chance at doing that.

So, what I'll do is create my own contest, with my own title, and then I'll win it.

Hmmmmm - - - ,

What kind of pseudo-quasi-realistic sounding title can I come up with which hasn't already been claimed by some obscure organization that few naive souls have ever heard tell of?

Aha!

I've got it!

I'll be "MISTER INTERGALACTIC FELONY FUGITIVE" ! ! !

Who's going to DARE compete against me in that category?

There might be a bunch of international felony fugitives hiding from INTERPOL out there somewhere, but I don't reckon they'll want to advertise themselves.

So, there goes my competition.

I qualify as a genuine, authentic, bona fide international fugitive by virtue of having served as a soldier of the United States Army in the old Republic of Viet Nam.

In 1967, Lord Bertrand Russell convened an International People's Tribunal in Stockholm, Sweden, which tried and convicted, in absentia, ALL American military personnel who served in the old Republic of Viet Nam of being war criminals.

Ain't that neat?

The long arm of the law has yet to capture me and impose sentence.

Aaaaand - - - ,

Since, admittedly, I am a convicted felon and a fugitive from justice, PLEEEEASE don't tell anyone I'm living at the Armed Forces Retirement Home in Gulfport, Mississippi!

Oh, by the way, since I only just now thunk up this idea, that there means that, for the time being, there ain't no rules, there ain't no standards, and there ain't no one in charge of this here intergalactic contest (except me).

So, for the time being, I'm claiming the intergalactic title of "MISTER INTERGALACTIC FELONY FUGITIVE".

It was a tough job trying to decide who the winner was, for in the final competition, me, myself, and I were all pretty evenly matched, but when all was said and done, I won.

All three (03) contestants, me, myself, and I, are to be congratulated for their heroic efforts.

Now, for the next step, I must somehow fix me up a fancy belt, with a fancy buckle, and a fancy trophy to prominently display on the shelf of my trophy room here in my palatial mansion located in a very exclusive neighborhood frequented by the wealthy, privileged elite of high society.

Don't you wish you was me, and could think up stuff like this?

Aha!

I gave you an idea, didn't I?

Thank you.

John Robert Mallernee
Armed Forces Retirement Home 
1800 Beach Drive, Unit 311 
Gulfport, Mississippi  39507 


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Wednesday, June 26, 2013

* * * ! ! ! INDEPENDENCE DAY 2013 ! ! ! * * *

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*************** WARNING ! ! ! *************** 

This dangerously illegal and highly immoral subversive underground resistance message is being surreptitiously monitored by the Beaming Internet Government Broadband Radio Oscillation Telecommunications Hearing Electronics Reconnaissance (i.e., "B.I.G. B.R.O.T.H.E.R.") as part of a coordinated clandestine domestic surveillance investigation, in cooperation with the National Administration of Zealous Interrogation (i.e., "N.A.Z.I.") and the Commission on Message Monitoring Investigative Electronics (i.e., "C.O.M.M.I.E.").

Serious felony criminal charges are pending, with extreme penalties yet to be determined! 

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Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

Boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, Independence Day is almost here!

Aye, but therein lies the rub. 

WHICH day IS the real Independence Day?

According to a letter that John Adams wrote to his wife, Abigail Adams,

"The Second Day of July 1776 will be the most memorable Epocha in the History of America. I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated by succeeding Generations as the great anniversary Festival. It ought to be commemorated as the Day of Deliverance by solemn Acts of Devotion to God Almighty. It ought to be solemnized with Pomp and Parade with Shews Games Sports Guns Bells Bonfires and Illuminations from one End of this Continent to the other from this Time forward forever more. You will think me transported with Enthusiasm but I am not. I am well aware of the Toil and Blood and Treasure that it will cost Us to maintain this Declaration and support and defend these States. Yet through all the Gloom I can see the Rays of ravishing Light and Glory. I can see that the End is more than worth all the Means. And that Posterity will tryumph in that Days Transaction even altho We should rue it which I trust in God We shall not."

By the way, those are not misspellings or grammatical errors in that quote.

Way back in those days, when people were more literate, pedantic, erudite, educated, intelligent, cultured, courteous, chivalrous, moral, pious, religious, and yes, even downright smarter than we are today, folks really did write that way, as our native English language was still evolving.

Well, Tuesday is also payday (!) for me, so I'm hoping I can go visit the local fireworks stand and get my grubby, sweaty, clumsy paws on a couple of tons of high explosives, so I can celebrate by blowing something up.

It's sort of a "guy" thing, kind of like baying at the moon.

What?

Don't YOU go out and bay at the full moon?

I would never miss a chance to do that!

Here in Mississippi, exploding fireworks are legal, and everybody goes to the beach to set them off.

Also, many of the casinos located along the beach put on a fireworks display, and I can watch the whole show from the balcony of my private quarters here on the Seventh Floor of Tower "C" at the Armed Forces Retirement Home in Gulfport, Mississippi.

On Monday, the new law takes effect, legalizing the open display of loaded firearms.

Under the new law (which is actually the old law that's merely been slightly amended for clarification), no license or permit is necessary when openly wearing a properly holstered pistol or revolver.

A Mississippi Firearms Permit is only required if wearing a concealed firearm.

Alas, but, we STILL need a federal judge to rule that residents at the Armed Forces Retirement Home can legally possess and carry loaded firearms on this property.

In three (03) previous cases, in other states, federal judges ruled that managers of federal housing units could not prohibit residents from owning, possessing, and/or carrying loaded firearms, when their state laws permitted it.

And, of all the residents in all the federally operated housing units, which group, other than the Armed Forces Retirement Home, has more extensive and specialized training, plus actual experience, in the safe and proper handling of firearms than us, huh?

So, where's that federal judge at?

Thank you.

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Tuesday, June 25, 2013

* * * ! ! ! UNBELIEVABLE ! ! ! * * *

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For the most enjoyable effect, please be sure and watch, in "FULL SCREEN" mode, this video recording from Austria of a unique performance by the MNOZIL BRASS band.



This video recording was posted at the YOU TUBE web site on Wednesday 09 February 2011 by the MNOZIL BRASS channel.
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COPYRIGHT DISCLAIMER 

Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act of 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research.

Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. 

Non-profit, educational, or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use.
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WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS?

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Hot diggitty doggitty!

For a larger view,
please click on the photograph,
or on this Internet link.
I saw this photograph (origins and credits unknown) posted at the FREE NORTH CAROLINA web site.

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THE MOON AND MY MAGIC NUMBER

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*************** WARNING ! ! ! *************** 

This dangerously illegal and highly immoral subversive underground resistance message is being surreptitiously monitored by the Beaming Internet Government Broadband Radio Oscillation Telecommunications Hearing Electronics Reconnaissance (i.e., "B.I.G. B.R.O.T.H.E.R.") as part of a coordinated clandestine domestic surveillance investigation, in cooperation with the National Administration of Zealous Interrogation (i.e., "N.A.Z.I.") and the Commission on Message Monitoring Investigative Electronics (i.e., "C.O.M.M.I.E.").

Serious felony criminal charges are pending, with extreme penalties yet to be determined! 

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Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

I reckon some of you folks might get tired of seeing me write about this same ol' thing, over and over and over and over and - - - ?

After all, it's only a very minor event, right?

It happens over and over again, all the time.

Why, it's not even noticeable, and certainly not worth remarking on and/or making any undue fuss over.

Ah, but I just can't help it!

I am continually overwhelmed by the sheer beauty and magnificence of the view.

A few minutes ago, here in my sumptuously furnished private quarters on the Seventh Floor of Tower "C" at the Armed Forces Retirement Home in Gulfport, Mississippi, I turned off my television set and stepped out onto my balcony.

Frankly, I was awe struck by the picturesque scenic beauty of the (nearly) full moon high over the Gulf of Mexico, with its light reflected off the surface of the water.

Yes, I know that I've said this same thing over and over.

But, I never tire of seeing it, or of telling everybody in the whole wide World all about it.

I only regret that YOU, and everybody else, including everyone in the whole wide World, can't be here to see what I see, as I'm seeing it.

Boy, am I blessed!

Just think - - - ,

What if I were BLIND, and could never see that full moon reflecting off the surface of the water?

What if I should die tomorrow?

No matter, I saw that moon this night.

Sooner or later, we all have to go.

So, let's appreciate the beauty of the moment, for who knows if we'll get another opportunity?

When I sat down at my computer to type this message, the computer's clock said "01:01". 

"101" is MY magic number!

That's because, as a young soldier in the United States Army, I served in the 101st Airborne Division "Screaming Eagles" during the war in the old Republic of Viet Nam.

Yeah, maybe it seems a bit of silly childishness to all the "normal" people in this World, but it's my own thing, having "101" as my magic number. 

Well, I can feel the side effects of my medication starting to wallop me, so I reckon I'll quit now.

But, if'n you're awake, run outside and look at that there moon, away off yonder.

If'n you're a guy, it's okay if you want to bay at it, for I reckon most of us guys, and quite a few hounds, wolves, and coyotes frequently enjoy doing that.

I ain't never seen no females doing that, so I reckon it's a "guy" thing, huh?

Boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, I'm sure glad I got to see that there moon.

Oh, and by the way, how DO you describe the beauty of the full moon to someone who has been blind from birth, and thus, has never experienced the vision?

Thank you. 

John Robert Mallernee
Armed Forces Retirement Home 
1800 Beach Drive, Unit 311 
Gulfport, Mississippi  39507

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Monday, June 24, 2013

RANDOM THOUGHTS AND QUERIES

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*************** WARNING ! ! ! *************** 

This dangerously illegal and immoral subversive underground resistance message is being surreptitiously monitored by the Beaming Internet Government Broadband Radio Oscillation Telecommunications Hearing Electronics Reconnaissance (i.e., "B.I.G. B.R.O.T.H.E.R.") as part of a coordinated clandestine domestic surveillance investigation, in cooperation with the National Administration of Zealous Interrogation (i.e., "N.A.Z.I.") and the Commission on Message Monitoring Investigative Electronics (i.e., "C.O.M.M.I.E.").

Serious felony criminal charges are pending, with extreme penalties yet to be determined! 

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Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space: 

Tomorrow, Tuesday 25 June 2013, is the birthday of my biologic ancestral Scottish clan, Clan Henderson. 

Independence Day is almost here!

What do you plan to do for Independence Day?

Please, ALWAYS refer to it as "Independence Day", and do NOT call it, the "Fourth of July"!

Interestingly, in a letter from John Adams to his wife, Abigail, he said we should celebrate Independence Day on the SECOND day of July!

Ain't that there something, huh?

Does anyone reading this e-mail message know anything about photography?

In 2006, I purchased a Kodak "Easy Share" Z710 zoom lens digital camera (which has now become obsolete), with an OSN MX2000 tripod, at the Wal-Mart in Vernal, Utah.

It's a good camera, and I've enjoyed taking lots of still photographs and recording lots of video, even recording up to two (02) hours at a time.

But, in bright sunlight, I can't see the image in my viewfinder.

I'm thinking of purchasing an extra large black pillowcase, which I could put over my head, and cutting a hole for the lens to poke through.

What do you think?

Will a pillowcase be large enough, or should I get something else?

Do you like railroad trains as much as I do?

I sure wish I could talk with someone who is (or was) employed by the railroad.

I've got lots of questions to ask.

Why does a locomotive sometimes ring its bell, and sometimes doesn't?

Why does a locomotive sometimes flash its ditch lights, and other times, doesn't?

What are the different signals of a locomotive whistle?

What are the different types of freight cars, and why are they designed and constructed the way they are?

I'm really intrigued by the evolution of freight containers, from what it was like when I was a boy, to what we see today.

When and why did railroads stop using cattle cars?

I haven't seen a cattle car on a railroad freight train in so many years, I can't even remember, have you?

What does the crew think about each time they climb into the cab?

The reason I wonder about that is because once that train is highballing, and with all those street crossings, there's no way to stop it, and sooner or later during the career of a railroad locomotive engineer and/or conductor, it's virtually inevitable that some idiot(s) will cross the tracks right smack dab in front of them, whether deliberately or accidentally.

Have you seen the 2007 Hollywood movie, "RAILS AND TIES"?



It's in my personal DVD library, and if you're a railroad buff, or a fan of Kevin Bacon and Marcia Gay Harden, you'll LOVE this show!

But, be prepared, because it's a family tear jerker.

Whenever I see someone who's physically or mentally disabled, I feel so sorry for them, and I count my blessings that I am so lucky.

Why?

Because they'll never get the opportunity I had, of serving in the United States Army during a time of war.

Maybe that sentiment sounds a little juvenile, but honestly, if it weren't for the United States Army, and the desperation entailed by a very unpopular war, whatever would have become of me?

Only folks who are personally acquainted with my traumatically turbulent adolescent background, with its seemingly insurmountable obstacles, can appreciate the true miracle that occurred when I was drafted into the United States Army on the afternoon of Thursday 07 December 1967.

What happens to a young man who knows he can never be a soldier?

Yes, 'tis the middle of Summer, but, I sure do enjoy looking at my Christmas tree, with the unopened presents underneath it, and the manger scene set up on the table, and my flickering fireplace on my new television screen.

Maybe I ought to order some fruit cake over the Internet.

It's been a long time since I ate any fruit cake, and I love that stuff.

Christmas would be a lot more fun if there was somebody here besides myself.

I wish it would snow.

I really miss the snow.

Well, it's almost time for my favorite television show, "ROUTE 66", which airs here each night during the week at 2100 Hours, from Pascagoula, Mississippi on WKFK-TV 7.



Tomorrow, Tuesday 25 June 2013, at 1400 Hours, members of the First United Methodist Church in Long Beach, Mississippi, will be here at the Armed Forces Retirement Home in Gulfport, Mississippi to put on a puppet show.

I hope I'll be awake and feeling well enough to go downstairs and see it.

If'n I feel well enough, maybe I'll even set up my camera and record it.

Thank you.

John Robert Mallernee
Armed Forces Retirement Home 
1800 Beach Drive, Unit 311 
Gulfport, Mississippi  39507

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UPDATE:

Well, I ain't gonna make it downstairs to see the puppet show.

Shucks, I cain't even make it as far as the mess hall, where I was looking forward to a hot dog and some French fries.

It's a good thing I have plenty of goodies in my room, along with a refrigerator and a microwave oven.

I'm just too faint and woozy, staggering and stumbling around all over the place.

Even as I type these words, I'm also experiencing some mental confusion and increasing lack of coordination.

So, I reckon I'll crawl back in the sack and go beddy bye.

Xin loi.
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Saturday, June 22, 2013

IF IT WEREN'T FOR BAD LUCK - - - ! ! !

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*************** WARNING ! ! ! *************** 

This dangerously illegal and immoral subversive underground resistance message is being surreptitiously monitored by the Beaming Internet Government Broadband Radio Oscillation Telecommunications Hearing Electronics Reconnaissance (i.e., "B.I.G. B.R.O.T.H.E.R.") as part of a coordinated clandestine domestic surveillance investigation, in cooperation with the National Administration of Zealous Interrogation (i.e., "N.A.Z.I.") and the Commission on Message Monitoring Investigative Electronics (i.e., "C.O.M.M.I.E.").

Serious felony criminal charges are pending, with extreme penalties yet to be determined! 

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Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

Tonight's the night of the biggest full moon ever, and here in Gulfport, Mississippi, the sky is clouded over and turning darker every minute, giving off fireworks and artillery.

I was so looking forward to taking my guitar and sitting on the beach, baying at the full Moon, and singing my original composition, "INSPIRED BY THE FULL MOON".

Oh, that ain't all.

Oh, no, there's MORE!

Can you even ever BELIEVE this is happening?

Finally, at long last, I was able to muster up sufficient physical energy to set up my camera and tripod on my balcony, so I could make a nice homemade amateur video recording of passing railroad freight trains.

I set up my folding chair, set up my TV tray, filled my Clan Henderson large pewter tankard to the brim with lots of ice cubes, to keep my Pepsi-Cola nice and cold, grabbed my guitar, sat down, and began wailing and/or caterwauling.

Sooner or later, a train was bound to come by, for we get lots of them, every few minutes, all day and all night.

So, there I am basking in the tropical humidity, strumming my guitar, singing favorite songs, sipping Pepsi-Cola, with my camera set up, aimed, and ready for a choo choo train that I know is on the way.

The sky got darker, the winds got windier, I could see and hear the approaching brilliantly blinding detonations of heavy ordnance.

Well, since I'm on the Seventh Floor, it probably ain't a good idea to be sitting on that balcony, and anyway, I must protect my camera.

Oh, by the way, you should have seen the sailboats and jet skis racing about on the nearby water!

Unfortunately, my camera isn't good enough to record them, or if it is, I can't tell, because the reflected sunlight blinds me (the roofs of the adjacent buildings below me are painted white), blocking me from seeing anything in my camera's viewfinder.

Mox nix.

So, I pack up my tripod and restore the camera to its computer charging dock, and then - - - ,

When it's too darn late, here comes a southbound freight train, pulled by two (02) big ol' thundering, rumbling CSX railroad locomotives, sounding its whistle and highballing down the track just as pretty as could be! 

WAAA - - - AAAUUUGH ! ! ! 

Life ain't fair.

And then, we die! 

WAAA - - - AAAUUUGH ! ! ! 

Oh, well, the movie, "HANOI HILTON", is on TV tonight, on the Military Channel.

For a larger view that's easier to read,
please click on the movie poster.
So, I'll nuke some chili and weiners and pop some corn.

Nifty, huh? 

Thank you.

John Robert Mallernee
Armed Forces Retirement Home 
1800 Beach Drive, Unit 311 
Gulfport, Mississippi  39507
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NOW THEN, in honor of this auspicious occasion, I present to you - - - ,

For the best effect, please be sure to enjoy watching, in "FULL SCREEN" mode, my homemade amateur video recording of ME (!), performing my original composition, "INSPIRED BY THE FULL MOON". 
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"INSPIRED BY THE FULL MOON"

Words and Music by:
JOHN ROBERT MALLERNEE 

Sunday 04 July 1993
Salt Lake City, Utah


CHORUS:
When the full moon
Climbs over the mountain
Shining cold
And lonesome up above:
Like a lone wolf
Howling through the darkness,
My heart aches
For a woman I can love.
Hear that locomotive
Cross the desert
As it wails
And thunders through the night:
And I know
It's time to wander onward;
Find the love
Who'll make my world all right.


VERSE # 01:
Somewhere out there,
Beyond the far horizon,
Lies a destined
Answer to a prayer.
There's a woman;
Lonely, lost, and looking
For someone to come
And rescue her out there.


VERSE # 02:
In a plane,
I'll fly across the heavens.
In a ship,
I'll sail across the sea.
Through hot jungle
And the freezing tundra,
Fight my way
To true love's victory!


VERSE # 03:
It's not right
To live without a woman.
No one knows
The lonely tears I've cried.
So, I'll search,
As all the world I wander,
Until at last,
My true love's by my side.

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UPDATE:  

Although, I was eagerly anticipating viewing the Military Channel's broadcast of the Hollywood movie production, "HANOI HILTON", it was disappointing to see this excellent and very timely major motion picture production cut to pieces by editors and censors.

Also, the skies did clear up, permitting me to enjoy seeing the full moon, moving higher and higher above the Gulf of Mexico, and, yes, it was beautiful, colorful, and awe inspiring, as its light was reflected off the waters.

But, feeling the side effects of my prescribed medications, I did not go sit on the nearby beach to strum my guitar, sing my favorite songs, and bay at the full moon.
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Friday, June 21, 2013

"JOHNNY OPTIMISM"

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Here is the hilarious "JOHNNY OPTIMISM" comic strip, created by Stilton Jarlsberg, M.D., for today, Friday 21 June 2013 - - - ,

For a larger view that's easier to read, 
please click on the comic strip.
"What doesn't kill you, makes you stranger."

The "JOHNNY OPTIMISM" comic strip, which is drawn by Stilton Jarlsberg, M.D., appears on the computer Internet each Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.

Please be sure and visit the "JOHNNY OPTIMISM" web site in order to enjoy reading the assorted amusing comments posted by fans and/or detractors.

"TB or not TB,
That is congestion. 
Consumption be done about it?
Of corpse, of corpse,
But, it takes a lung, lung time."

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