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Monday, December 29, 2008

Movie Critique: "THE CUTTING EDGE"

Greetings and Salutations to All my Kith and Kin and All the Ships in Outer Space:

At the request of the spouse of an employee (who wishes to remain anonymous) here at the Armed Forces Retirement Home, I watched a DVD of the motion picture, THE CUTTING EDGE, made in 1992.

Yes, it's a "chick flick", and no, I'd never have watched this movie if a special request hadn't been made for me to review it.

The story is about a guy who plays hockey, but due to injuries, he is forced to quit the game.

Then he is condemned to Hell, forced to become a figure skater.

From a guy's perspective, the only good thing about figure skating is the girl.

Hollywood wants us to believe a guy would actually do this, or that it's even possible for a guy with no training or experience to suddenly master arts which takes professional figure skaters a lifetime of discipline and self sacrifice to acquire.

If you haven't seen this film, I won't ruin the movie by telling you anything more regarding the plot.

But, since it's a typical "chick flick", you can probably guess how it will come out.

What interested me was Moira Kelly's eerie physical resemblance to Patty Duke when she was a young girl, and sometimes, when speaking her lines, she even sounded like Patty Duke.

I was also in love with the gorgeous redhead with blue eyes!

Oh, how I wanted HER!!!

I think the name of the actress was Rachelle Ottley, but I'm not certain.

There are NO photographs of Rachelle Ottley anywhere on the Internet.

But, she has red hair and blue eyes and - - - oooohh!!!

So, that's my movie review.

There are some scenes and dialogue which are sexual, and it wasn't necessary to put those in the movie.

But, unfortunately, that's how virtually all Hollywood movies are being made these days.

Pass the popcorn, please.

Thank you.

John Robert Mallernee, KB3KWS
Official Bard of Clan Henderson
Armed Forces Retirement Home
Washington, D.C. 20011-8400

NOTE: "My unpopular and controversial personal opinions are independent of my Scottish clan."

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